{"id":73,"date":"2002-08-29T22:57:13","date_gmt":"2002-08-30T06:57:13","guid":{"rendered":"\/?p=73"},"modified":"2007-03-28T17:05:38","modified_gmt":"2007-03-29T01:05:38","slug":"just-add-sugar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.aprilgem.com\/log\/?p=73","title":{"rendered":"Just ADD Sugar"},"content":{"rendered":"

Someone brought saltwater taffy to work yesterday and left it out so everyone could have a piece or two, and—not one to pass up an opportunity—I helped myself to several.<\/p>\n

Well…<\/p>\n

I might as well have been bouncing off the walls and making cattle calls after that; I was so high on sugar, I ran around the building like a maniac. I simply couldn’t sit still, and my co-workers noticed. One of them feared that I would overdose on the taffy, and as I did the jitterbug in my chair, I assured everyone that I would be fine. Then I proceeded to hum a long list of Broadway tunes at 900 beats per minute while I worked.<\/p>\n

The upside was that I finished about three days of work in a single morning. The downside was… heck, there was<\/i> no downside. By the time I crashed from my sugar high, I’d done enough that I could do whatever I wanted for a while.<\/p>\n

The incident made me think of days past. Back when I was a student, I worked at a movie theater, and the house manager just loved to bring me sweets. Normally, I was the epitome of the perfect employee—big, beautiful, wonderful smiles for the customers, even when they were rude. I was so frickin’ charming, I made even the ill-tempered cheapskate smile.<\/p>\n

But on sugar, man… I was unstoppable. I was the poster child for ADD<\/a>.<\/p>\n

One night, the manager actually had me manning the portable snack bar, which usually didn’t get a whole lot of customers. However, after he fed me a chocolate bar, I lured so many people from the main snack bar that I broke an all-time record. Not only that, but a total stranger asked me out as he bought a soda, and he seemed completely befuddled in the act.<\/p>\n

I don’t know what it is. Sugar just does that to me sometimes. The manager’s theory was that it increased the amperage in my smile, but that’s just a fanciful way of looking at it. I think the truth is that I’m an alien, and sugar is a drug on my home planet.<\/p>\n

Thank goodness it doesn’t affect me as much as it used to. I’m getting too old for that kind of thing<\/a>.<\/p>\nShare this post:

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Someone brought saltwater taffy to work yesterday and left it out so everyone could have a piece or two, and—not one to pass up an opportunity—I helped myself to several. Well… I might as well have been bouncing off the walls and making cattle calls after that; I was so high on sugar, I ran around the building like a maniac. I simply couldn’t sit still, and my co-workers noticed. One of them feared that I would overdose on the…<\/p>\n

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