{"id":151,"date":"2003-01-24T22:13:15","date_gmt":"2003-01-25T06:13:15","guid":{"rendered":"\/?p=151"},"modified":"2006-12-27T22:15:12","modified_gmt":"2006-12-28T06:15:12","slug":"i-cant-lemonade-stand-it-any-more","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.aprilgem.com\/log\/?p=151","title":{"rendered":"I Can’t Lemonade Stand It Any More"},"content":{"rendered":"

May You Live in Interesting Times<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Though I put on a brave smile for everyone, most especially on this, the first month of the year, my personal life is quietly blowing up in my face. I won’t go into detail, but right now my life is a very large exploding bag of lemons, and all that yellow fruit is hurling outwards into space in a big bang, knocking me senseless on their way to create new worlds of trouble. Good gawd. Have you ever tried to dodge fruit?<\/p>\n

[And while I’m on the topic of dodging fruit, let me digress a little. Do you ever wonder about the tomato-throwing audience at a stereotypically bad stage act? I do. I always wonder how anyone goes to a show bringing rotten vegetables with them. Is that what people eat instead of popcorn at those stage shows? That’s crazy.]<\/p>\n

But anyway, back to the abundance of lemonade in my life. It’s all Murphy’s fault<\/a>, you know. Murphy is my pet peeve, and he leaves large piles of crap<\/a> in the middle of my living life. He is far worse than the pet cat in that respect, and let me tell you… that’s saying a whole lot.<\/p>\n

So… the way Murphy operates is this: if you are the type of person who makes lemonade out of the lemons Life gives<\/a> you, then Murphy will find some way to keep giving you lemons until you are so sick of lemonade you want to hurl, hurl them out into space. And for some godawful reason, I cannot break Murphy’s Law to save my sanity.<\/p>\n

Meanwhile, there Murphy sits, blithely pooping in my living life as I continually do my best to clean up the mess with a winning smile, and I can’t even chant, “This too shall pass,” without thinking of the word “pass” as a euphemism for more pet peeve poop.<\/p>\n

I totally need to put him up for adoption.<\/p>\nShare this post:

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May You Live in Interesting Times. Though I put on a brave smile for everyone, most especially on this, the first month of the year, my personal life is quietly blowing up in my face. I won’t go into detail, but right now my life is a very large exploding bag of lemons, and all that yellow fruit is hurling outwards into space in a big bang, knocking me senseless on their way to create new worlds of trouble. Good…<\/p>\n

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